Superman Through the Ages! Forum

Funny and apropos, if not particularly scholarly -- or is it?


BATMAN VS. BING CROSBY

Prominent characteristic?
BATS: Big ears
BING: Big ears

Day job?
BATS: Obscenely rich millionaire
BING: Obscenely rich millionaire

Clownish arch-enemy?
BATS: The Joker
BING: Bob Hope

Ambiguously gay sidekick?
BATS: Robin, the Boy Wonder
BING: David Bowie

Wardrobe?
BATS: Dark leather bodysuit
BING: Colorful Hawaiian shirts

Headgear?
BATS: Wears cowl to hide identity
BING: Wears hats to hide male pattern baldness

Accessories?
BATS: Uses utility belt to fight crime
BING: Uses belt to beat children till they bleed

Favorite vehicle?
BATS: Batmobile
BING: Golf cart

Most popular song?
BATS: "Batman Theme" by Neal Hefti
BING: "White Christmas" by Irving Berlin

Nicknames?
BATS: The Dark Knight, The Caped Crusader
BING: The Old Groaner, Der Bingle, The First Hip White Person

Quasi-mystical cult training?
BATS: Ninja
BING: Jesuit

Well-known hometown political figure named "Jim"?
BATS: Gotham City's Police Commissioner Jim Gordon
BING: Spokane's anti-gay rights, subsequently-outed Mayor Jim West

Charity work?
BATS: Wayne Foundation
BING: Bing Crosby National Pro-Am golf tournament

Superhuman Jewish predecessor/colleague?
BATS: Superman
BING: Al Jolson

Membership organization?
BATS: Justice League
BING: Rhythm Boys

Oscar win?
BATS: Best Art Direction-Set Decoration for "Batman" ('89)
BING: Best Actor for "Going My Way" ('44)

Longtime workplace?
BATS: Batcave
BING: Kraft Music Hall

Favorite musical arranger?
BATS: Nelson Riddle
BING: John Scott Trotter

Frequently wakes to?
BATS: The Bat-Signal
BING: Minute Maid orange juice

Career guidance?
BATS: Bob Kane
BING: Jack Kapp

Desperate career move of the late 1960s?
BATS: Adds Batgirl to TV series
BING: Sings "Hey Jude"

Skinny nemesis with ties to organized crime?
BATS: The Scarecrow
BING: Frank Sinatra

Likes to swing on?
BATS: A Bat-Grapple line
BING: A star